Oct 5, 2021 | Stories
Lauren Sullivan has called Pleasant Valley her church home for her entire life. She and her older brother ran through the halls as children while their parents served throughout the church. As Lauren grew into a middle school and high school student, she continued to be involved in church and was baptized at Summerfest in eighth grade alongside her friend, Lauren Simoneau.
While Lauren was active and involved in student ministry, she wasn’t incredibly vocal about her faith.
“Everyone knew I went to church but I wouldn’t go around professing the Gospel.”
While Lauren was growing up, falling in love with Jesus and deepening her relationship with Him, Spencer Hamilton was attending PV as well, although far less involved.
“I first accepted Jesus in kindergarten, but it didn’t become my own thing until later in life. Sports were important and church went to the wayside. Going into high school, I fell into this pit of an image I needed to maintain. I wanted to get more involved in student ministry but I was afraid of what it would look like in high school, so I was ‘too cool’ for church.”
It was in college for both Lauren and Spencer that the Lord began to really move in their hearts. Lauren recalls:
“I went to college and freshman year sucked. It was really hard. In high school, I was towards the top of the social ladder. I was really involved with lots of friends, but when I got to college, Mizzou was just so big. It was hard to get involved, and I didn’t have friends. People only wanted to drink, and I didn’t want to do that. My faith was rocky there for a bit.”
Change for Lauren began towards the end of her freshman year.
“I got a really good small group, and the leaders were my small group leaders for three years. They gave me the spark I needed and the friendship I needed that pointed me to Jesus. That is the reason my faith is so strong today – they pointed me to Jesus. They had really hard lives, but their faith was amazing. They pushed me to read and study my Bible. I hadn’t read it as much in high school. This helped me to see the Bible as His whole story, His whole redemption story.”
Spencer recognized that the Lord had been moving in his heart for a while, but he finally responded when he got to college.
“When I went to college, the Holy Spirit had been doing a work in me for a while. I remember sitting with friends and just realizing that something wasn’t right with my current college situation.”
For Spencer, after hearing the Holy Spirit speak to him, he changed paths immediately.
“I had a complete 180. I came back home and began attending UMKC, then I got really involved at 20-somethings and interned at PV. This opened the door to friendships I could’ve had in high school. It was this creation of a life I thought I was too cool for, but the life the Lord intended for me to have all along.”
It was their mutual friend, Lauren Simoneau, that helped bring their two stories together by suggesting they give dating a try in their sophomore year of college. Lauren remembers:
“Lauren Simoneau put us together, but it didn’t go well. You can’t build a long-distance relationship without a foundation of friendship. So we broke up, which is a story of God’s timing. We weren’t ready yet, and we needed to grow.”
Their breakup didn’t go well, and Lauren’s heart was pretty bitter towards Spencer.
“That’s a huge part of our story. The Lord had to change my heart towards him, but He can change our hearts. And God was able to do that in our story.”
Their friend, Lauren Simoneau, had a kidney transplant during their junior year of college, so Lauren came back to Kansas City to support her friend. Lauren Simoneau’s insistence on having Spencer at the hospital as well brought Lauren and Spencer into proximity with one another. Lauren laughs as she says,
“Spencer’s dad was telling him, ‘You need to start dating again and get off the couch.’”
Spencer recalls that bizarre afternoon when he went to visit their friend in the hospital.
“I was going to get a haircut, but when I found out Lauren was with our friend, Lauren, at the hospital,I drove to Liberty Hospital instead. They weren’t even there. She was at Research! So we sat with our friend, and sparks were flying between Lauren and I. I thought she liked me.”
But Lauren wasn’t feeling those same sparks and kept telling herself, “No. I’ll never date him again. Not after what happened.”
The next time they were at church, however, Lauren asked Spencer to sit with her.
“Then I tried to ask her out in the lobby of Pleasant Valley. But I couldn’t get the words out and by the time I started to, her mom came out and asked if she was ready to go eat at Margaritas.”
Eventually, they did start dating. But their stronger walks with the Lord was a steady foundation for a relationship with Christ at the center.
After they graduated from college, Lauren began teaching elementary school while Spencer began a career as an analyst during their engagement, and they wed right in the middle of the Covid-19 pandemic. With a twinkle in his eye, Spencer comments:
“We got married in June of 2020 and had a reception in August. I like to say that my 60 day free trial was up, and it was time to renew it.”
When asked how they’ve seen Jesus in their marriage, Lauren responds:
“The sacrifices you make when you’re married point to Jesus’ sacrifices. It helps us to be less selfish with everyday life. We try to read the Bible more together and focus on praying together, which makes intimacy so much better. We also have a cool opportunity to model marriage well since none of our other friends are married. We do our best to show them a healthy, God-honoring marriage.”
Spencer adds:
“When people see our marriage, we want it to point towards Jesus. We serve together in the nursery and getting to serve alongside my wife is one of the cooler aspects.”
Spencer goes on to talk about the transformation he’s seen in Lauren during their marriage.
“I’ve seen her confidence grow. Finding a job out of college was not easy for Lauren, and there was a lot of discouragement there. I knew deep down that she was worthy of whatever job she was going to get. But it was hard for a long time. And when she finally got a job, it was harder than she anticipated. Seeing Lauren find a way to bring that discouragement to the Lord and her faith in the Lord to get through all of that was incredible. For her heart to be so burdened and feel so inadequate, but to see her go to the Lord was just really cool. I truly see this year is the fruit of that time with the Lord for her. She has one of the best classrooms in the school, and the principal has picked her out to have people shadow her. I’m so proud.”
Lauren’s face if full and beaming when she turns to Spencer and says,
“I’ve seen redemption in the way you love others. I’m much more extroverted and when we were first married, you didn’t always want to call a friend or hang out with people. But I think the way you love people now – it is evident you go out of your way to show love. You see hanging out with people as a way to love people, and a way we can show them God’s love, especially with our friends who aren’t Christians. You’re bold with your faith. You’ve always loved people, but the way you do it now is so much greater. You love people well by calling them when they have a bad week. You’re not extroverted but you’re pushing yourself to be intentional about relationships, and you’re so intentional with me.”
While transformation for people who have grown up in the Church can look more gradual, a definite change from the apathetic high school student Spencer was and the bitter heart in Lauren is proof of God’s transformation power in Lauren and Spencer, and their marriage is a beautiful picture of how God is always moving and working, even when we can’t see it. As Lauren ponders, she cocks her head to the side and says:
“You know, this world will never satisfy us. I can’t put my hope in Spencer or my parents. They’ll never live up to my expectations. God is worthy of my praise and love, and He’s more than enough for me. Jesus is enough.”
Spencer nods is head in agreement, and adds:
“Throughout explaining my journey and faith, when I was being a knucklehead, He was still pursuing me. And when I decided to go all in, He was still there, even as I’ve had to course-correct at times. Jesus is constant.”
Sep 28, 2021 | Stories
Normalizing mental health has been on the rise, and it is in part thanks to the brave individuals willing to share their own journeys with mental health despite the topic that can still feel taboo. One of these brave individuals is Stacy Daniel. Over the course of time, Stacy has become increasingly vocal in sharing her journey with mental illness, while always coupling her struggles with the hope she has in Jesus. Throughout Stacy’s life, both the triumphant milestones and mundane moments, her mental health has played a part.
“I struggled with mental illness since I was little; that theme is woven throughout my whole journey. Brad and I have done a lot of work. It is a big part of my story – besides Jesus. When I was younger people didn’t talk about [mental illness] or understand it.”
Stacy grew up attending church with her family and chose to follow Jesus when she was in fifth grade. Growing up in a small town in Missouri, where everyone knew everyone, she had always known Brad, but they eventually fell in love and married, and soon after Amberlie was born. When she was two, Brad’s job moved them to Seattle.
Once they got there, Brad and Stacy began trying to expand their family again and during that time, something significant happened. The mental illness Stacy had been unknowingly struggling with her entire life was finally given a name – depression.
“To have a psychologist diagnose me – to have somebody who knows, give me an answer and say, ‘Hey this isn’t anything you’ve done. This is just what it is.’ That was huge. It’s not sadness. That’s what a lot of people think it is. It’s a chronic illness.”
Despite the depression, Seattle played an important part of God’s future callings on Brad’s and Stacy’s lives.
“Seattle was a key to a lot of things I think. That’s where we grew up in our marriage. We got connected with a community group at a church there. That’s where adoption started. One of the couples was in the fostering-to-adopt process and one of the other couples – she was adopted. It wasn’t anything I had considered before, but that’s where the seeds were planted. And China became heavy on my heart during that time. I didn’t know why then but I do now. God also planted seeds in Brad and began giving him a heart for students. So a lot of seeds were planted at that church.
But it was a discovery.
The infertility, the depression, and ministry.”
Brad and Stacy never conceived the second baby they were trying for and after two years in Seattle, they moved back to Missouri. Brad had a lot of health problems and most of them were ear infections triggered by allergies to pine, mold, and other vegetation in Washington. After a few ear surgeries, Brad’s doctor told him he needed to move back to Missouri. They settled in the Kansas City area. Not only would Brad’s physical health benefit from this move, but Stacy’s mental health would, too.
“The first thing I noticed was how blue the skies are. We were in Seattle in a bad winter. I knew that fall used to get to me but I thought it was because of going back to school and I hated school. But then there was no one going to school in my life and it kept happening. I learned that blue skies and daylight are important for me. I can tell you exactly when the days are getting shorter. I can tell you even before the news people do. Winters are like hibernation for me.”
When they moved back to Kansas City, they began attending Pleasant Valley. Brad began serving in the student ministry, and Stacy served in the nursery. Then, the seed planted for students in Brad, began to grow.
“Brad wasn’t content at work. We knew his job was going away, and he started feeling disconnected. He had talked to some people and said to me, ‘I may be called to ministry’, and I said, “No I don’t think so. I don’t see us ever doing that.” Through that process, he got a part time job [at PV] but when he became full-time is when I really hit rock bottom.”
When Amberlie was around seven, and shortly after Brad accepted the position of Junior High Student Pastor at PV, Stacy’s mental health took a turn for the worse. Her daily routine consisted of waking up to take Amberlie to school, sitting on the couch and staring or taking a nap until it was time to get Amberlie, then do what she needed to do until bedtime. But when bedtime finally came, Stacy couldn’t sleep.
“Something was really wrong, and it wasn’t going away. When Brad went into full-time ministry I wondered “How can this be happening? If I’m like this, I can’t be a pastor’s wife.” Plus the struggle of having a baby. Infertility didn’t help the depression. I had adopted this ‘I’m not a good mom’ mindset. The enemy uses anything to make you feel like: ‘I must not be a good mom if I’m not getting my blessing.’ Then the spiral goes down. But at that point I was almost too numb to feel anything. The depression played into the idea that I was wrong and I was flawed and I wasn’t good enough. But also, I felt during that time that I can’t do anything for God anyways. How can I be worthy? I couldn’t see the light.”
One day Stacy was in a very dark place when Brad made the decision to call Stacy’s doctor because he knew she couldn’t.
“I remember opening my Bible and praying, ‘Okay God, I can’t feel You and I’m not sure You’re there but I know that You are.’ My Bible was opened to “The light shines in the darkness and the darkness has not overcome it.” [John 1:5] I felt a lot of fear. That was my first panic attack. I was really scared. I felt like something was going to consume me.”
After Brad made the call to Stacy’s doctor, she began going to counseling and taking medication. It was a long process to discover which medications worked best for Stacy’s body, but soon, things began to change.
“It took quite a while until I was able to see color. One day I woke up and was able to see things. I felt like I was seeing in black and white and now I’m seeing color. Medication is what helped me. I still had work to do though. Medicine isn’t a magic pill. It just gave me the energy and ability to do the work and continue to heal.”
As Stacy’s life became more vibrant and she walked towards healing, she began praying about adoption again.
Stacy continued to go to therapy, and her doctor shared that the medication was almost like she was in remission from the depression. There were times Stacy wanted to be done. She wanted to be done taking medication and done talking to a therapist, but she learned that her body doesn’t work that way. She doesn’t get to decide that she’s done having a chronic illness.
As their adoption process continued, there were times they wondered if it would happen because the timeline kept getting pushed back. However, when Amberlie was 11, she and her parents flew to China for two weeks to adopt Emma – the one-year-old baby they’d been praying for who completely captured their hearts.
After Emma got home, Stacy learned to give herself more grace for the seasons she isn’t able to pour herself out as much as she might want to. Stacy has learned that every fall and winter she has to step back from being as involved in activities to give herself room to make it through the winter.
Throughout Stacy’s journey, in the darkest of moments when she felt like God was nowhere to be seen, she clung to the fact that she knew He was still there. When she couldn’t see the light, He reminded her through Scripture that the darkness has not overcome the light. She could not be consumed.
“God’s just been there. He’s been so good and so kind to give me glimpses of that grace when I need it.”
With Stacy’s struggle through depression, one of her biggest convictions has been something the Lord spoke to her…
“He said to me, ‘I created you and I decided when you were born. I am the only One who gets to take your life.’ He’s told me this more than once. There’s a firmness. ‘I gave you life and I’m the only One who can take it.’ It doesn’t sound like kindness, but it is. I know some people laugh when I say my favorite verse is ‘Jesus wept.’ But for all of the weeping I’ve done, just to know that Jesus is God and in His humanity, He gets me…”
Stacy’s voice trails off as she fights back the tears, her hand reaches up to tuck her hair behind her ear.
“I can’t grasp it or comprehend it, but His kindness… I get to see Him in the little things. In the tears – that’s where I feel like I connect a lot with Him.”
Stacy’s journey has not been an easy one, and she still struggles with seasonal depression every year. When she feels like the winter will never end, when the depression is feeling especially heavy, Brad reminds her that she’s felt this way before, and she’s always made it through the winter. As Stacy prepares for the darker days each year, she holds on tight to the peace Jesus brings her.
“In fifth grade, when I said I want to follow Him, His peace is what I wanted and that’s what I continue to come back to.”
“Jesus is my peace.”
Jul 15, 2021 | Stories
Rah’Keisha is known around Pleasant Valley for her warm smile, her deep and heartfelt prayers, and her passion for Jesus. Rah’Keisha explains that the suburbs of Kansas City haven’t always been her home. She lived in the inner city of Kansas City until she was four or five then lived with her great-grandma for several years.
“My mom was a teen mom, and my brother and I are one year and seven months apart. She was really young. Growing up without a dad, I dealt with rejection. I don’t feel like I have an issue with loving, but it was hard when I didn’t feel love from others. For many years I just felt tolerated by certain people.”
Rah’Keisha’s great-grandma, Grammy Ida, loves the Lord and is deeply impactful in Rah’Keisha’s walk with Him while also being the motherly influence.
“Grammy Ida is 87 now and looks like she’s 60. She is up and moving and driving and living on her own. She would always take us to church, and we would be there all day. Everything was Christ-centered. I know people have experiences of seeing people who are influential in their life and they see certain failures,but she’s completely sold out, as much as we can be in our human form. I’ve seen her get upset but her voice never elevates or anything like that. She disciplined us though. But she was always so sweet and generous. Even if you go to her house now, it doesn’t matter your relationship with her, she’s going to make sure you’re not hungry and comfortable. We didn’t grow up with a lot of money, but I wouldn’t have ever known that with her. It is just amazing how God uses her in our lives.”
Grammy Ida was Rah’Keisha’s constant when everything else was often changing – she and her mom and brother moved every year or so until she was in high school. Because of Grammy Ida’s consistency and spiritual influence, Rah’Keisha decided to follow Jesus as a little girl.
“I accepted Christ as my Savior at the age of nine and was baptized around the same time. The church I grew up in didn’t have a baptismal so we went to another church.”
Rah’Keisha’s story isn’t this simple, however.
“Around four or five years old, that’s when I was molested for the first time,and it lasted until I was 13-14. It led to me being promiscuous as a teenager. There was a spirit of perversion and the enemy tried to take me out, not physically but mentally.”
Rah’Keisha went into high school struggling, and it only got harder from there.
“My high school years were really hard for me. There was a lot of stress. It was just me, my mom, and my brother, and he got in a lot of trouble – he was away for a while. Throughout high school I found myself being very promiscuous because of things when I grew up. I was in a relationship where I thought I was so in love, but there was a lot of verbal abuse and disrespect because I didn’t know who I was, so I was allowing things [to happen in our relationship], even things that my mouth would say I wouldn’t allow. I see a lot of things go back to not having a father figure to teach me about men or about how to respect myself.”
Because of the Holy Spirit dwelling in her, Rah’Keisha felt convicted.
“Promiscuity was always uncomfortable. When we’re in sin we say it is fun, but deep down inside I knew it wasn’t right and it didn’t feel good. For a long time I didn’t know my worth. I knew it was wrong but didn’t operate out of that. The Lord would say, ‘This is not what you want to do or who you are.’ I wasn’t doing everything to fit in, and it felt like I was a leader, but still fell into sin. There was a lot of hurt and pain, and that’s why I did what I did. I was trying to find love in all the wrong places.
Rah’Keisha crosses her arms onto the table in front of her, her pearl earrings shimmer in the light while she tilts her head and remembers…
“There was this one year at Christmas – my favorite holiday – I guess we were doing really bad. We had no decorations or Christmas tree or presents – it was so crazy because we didn’t have any of that. But I was in my room, it was across the hall from my mom’s room. We weren’t even communicating much at all. But I sat in the corner of my room just bawling because God was showing me that this was my favorite holiday and I don’t have anything, but I had everything I needed. Which is Him. It was so eye-opening. After that, Christ was just calling me back into Himself. From that moment on, I strove to do what was right in His eyes.”
When she graduated from high school, Rah’Keisha chose to completely commit herself back to Him. “Take all of me. I surrender.” was her heart’s cry and her prayer. No more was she going to look to boys to find love and acceptance. No more was she going to allow her past trauma and hurt define who God has created her to be.
“It’s so amazing because I’ve always viewed God as, ‘He is who He says He is.’.I can see how He kept me in those moments [when I was being molested]. He’s not a God who winks at sin or wants people to experience those types of things, but it’s because of sin we have to endure those kinds of things. For the people molesting me, He wasn’t telling them to do that. I always viewed Him to be my protector. At times it was very hard to walk in that – Him as my protector – but I always knew it.”
God never left Rah’Keisha- not when she was a little girl moving and making new friends, not when she was being molested, and not during her wild high school days. He never stopped loving her. He never stopped pursuing her. He never stopped calling her back to Him.
“Now my relationship with God – it is way deeper than it used to be. Now that I know that I can go to Him for anything even in the midst of trials and hard situations, He’s there. He loves me. Nothing can stop Him from loving me. He’s a righteous God and doesn’t wink at my sin, but He’s a gracious God and I can go to Him with a repentant heart and be restored. He is my safety. Above all, He is my everything. Literally. Sometimes it is still hard for me. I’ve dealt with a lot of condemnation and Bible-thumping, and I started to wonder, ‘Does God really love me? Am I forgiven?’ But now I hear God say, ‘What does My Word say?’ I learned not to turn from Him, but to stay at His feet. I know He is who He says He is. I stand on that. Jesus is faithful. He’s true. He’s forgiving. He’s gracious. He’s longsuffering. He’s all-knowing and all-powerful. Jesus is my everything.”
Jun 24, 2021 | Stories
Holly Mast emits sincerity and peace with every single interaction. Her gentle nature, intricate vocabulary, and deep wisdom make it hard to believe she’s only a senior in high school. Holly pulls out her chair, her baggy sweatshirt falling below her palms and her white sneakers reminiscent of a style her parents likely wore when they were her age. She adores her family and immediately begins talking about her parents and younger two siblings.
“Both of my parents are really strong Christians, so that’s been a good foundation for me and my faith. They’re also very supportive of me. Most people would say the career I’m heading towards isn’t a stable career, but my parents say, ‘If it’s for God – great!’”
Holly may still be in high school, but she feels God has already given her direction of what career path she’s supposed to head down.
“I know God wants me to do something with music. I’m not sure what that looks like yet. I’ve done a lot of songwriting, even though it is hard sometimes. I’m learning how to play the guitar and that is going ok – but not great.”
Holly giggles and her eyes twinkle as she’s recalling her previous guitar lessons.
“I’m going to major in media production in college. I’m hoping to do something with worship arts in church, but the thing I want to do the most is record my own music and possibly write songs for more people – whatever I can do in my life to use music to glorify God.”
However, Holly’s journey to this decision hasn’t been easy. Depression and deep insecurities have made a regular appearance in Holly’s life.
“Depression has shaped me the most – not that I’m defined by it, because I’m not. The depressive symptoms and the apathy had been developing for a long time, but it all culminated my freshman year in a very bad way. It wasn’t that I didn’t believe in God, I was just very apathetic about Him and in my mind, I had bigger things to deal with than God. I was sad all the time, couldn’t get out of bed, or socialize with people. I thought, ‘Why should I care about going to church and furthering my relationship with God and reading my Bible?’ Those were things that didn’t even cross my mind. So, God and I drifted apart for a really long time.”
The summer before ninth grade, Holly attended Summerfest and had the realization that depression may be something she was struggling with.
“My friend had shared that she was struggling with depression and the things she had been feeling. I didn’t know what depression was but as she was talking I was like, ‘That’s me. I feel that way, too!’ I had a complete emotional breakdown after everyone went to worship. I went into my freshman year and for maybe two weeks everything was fine. But after that it came back way worse.”
Despite Holly’s struggle, or perhaps because of her struggle, with mental health and apathy towards her relationship with God, she hit a breaking point and in a desperate prayer, cried out:
“God, I can’t do this anymore. The way I feel is terrible, and I can’t fix this on my own, and I don’t know what to do. I feel directionless. I have no idea what my purpose is or why I’m even here.”
Then the Holy Spirit began to whisper in Holly’s heart.
“I heard Him say, ‘You are made for so much more than all of this’. I felt like He was saying, ‘You are made for more than this depression, but in order to overcome this you need to tell somebody. You can’t do this alone.’ He also said, ‘You need to come back to Me and let Me lead you.’”
Slowly, Holly began to work on her relationship with the Lord.
I began to talk to God every day. Even stupid things, ‘Oh, nice weather today’, just to keep in mind that He’s right there – a point of reference. I started getting back in the Word. and I told my parents what I was going through and began seeing a Christian therapist so I could heal spiritually as well.”
This slow and steady spiritual and mental transformation was crucial for Holly to discover her direction and her purpose, which was the second half of her prayer.
“There’s that moment of realizing how much I needed God. I need Him and His purpose and not my own. That was the place that changed my life the most.”
From there, God began to move and work in Holly’s heart, and she was able to fully listen to His promptings. She has always loved music, but stage fright can consume her and she doesn’t like to be the center of attention.
“I had been feeling purposeless and directionless, and now, looking back I can see that His answer to my prayer of showing me a purpose was a pressing He had on my heart a few months later when I just felt like I needed to try out for the worship team. But I felt like it was all in my head, so I fought it for such a long time. Then we had a sermon about the rich young ruler and how there were certain things he wasn’t willing to give up to follow Jesus. God asked me, ‘What’s your thing? I’ll give you a hint… it has to do with music.’ So then I was like, ‘Ok, You win.’”
Just because Holly is willing doesn’t mean it has come easily for her. She joined the worship team for the student ministry, but struggled every single time she led worship.
“I was terrified every time I went on stage. My stomach hurt and I would feel like I was going to throw up. It was terrible.”
When Holly went on a mission trip to Ecuador, her fear collided with her willingness.
“I kind of had a turning point when I was in Ecuador. I was asked five minutes in advance to lead the team in worship. I had a panic attack and couldn’t do it. I’d been obedient to His call but didn’t trust Him. That’s a learning curve. As I became more confident with who God made me to be, I accepted the person God made me to be. My love of music continued to grow and I began trusting God more.”
Holly has continued to grow in her relationship with God. She still battles intense stage fright every time she leads worship, but continually surrenders to God, following Him in obedience and trusting that He has a purpose for her even in the midst of fear.
She clings tightly to Jesus, trusting that He’ll carry her through it all, as she continues to heal from depression and live out God’s calling in her life to pursue music. Now, Holly feels the exact opposite of apathy for God.
“I don’t want this to sound irreverent, but Jesus is a friend. Obviously I don’t think of Him as if ‘God is my homie.’ I understand that He’s the King of the universe. There are times I feel like God is looking at me thinking, ‘You are absolutely ridiculous.’ But it doesn’t take long in His presence to know that isn’t how He views me at all. Jesus is there for me, understands me, is an advocate for my healing, and when there are days that are hard for me, I can just wake up and talk to Him. He’s not going to condemn me or tell me I could be better. He tells me He’s there for me and will walk with me. That closeness and intimacy with God, you can’t experience anywhere else – that deep comradery I feel with Him. Jesus is my friend.”
Jun 3, 2021 | Stories
The next generation has much to offer the world, the United States, and even better, the Kingdom. Discipleship is crucial and Pleasant Valley is passionate about raising leaders who will continue to make disciples. Caleb Ezzell is an example of one of the many students who have come out of PV’s student ministry excited to know God more intimately and passionate about furthering the Kingdom.
When Caleb was in fifth grade, his family began attending Pleasant Valley and quickly became active in different ministries. While Caleb had been a Christian for several years, it was during his time in PV’s middle school and high school ministries and discipleship from their ministry partners that his spiritual life flourished. Caleb and his older brother were actively involved in the ministries of his church while his parents volunteered in the student ministry as well.
When asked about what experiences impacted him the most, Caleb responded:
“I think the biggest impact for me were the mission trips I was able to go on. PV pushes serving as a huge priority – you want to be able to serve the Lord as much as you worship Him and serving is a form of worship. I had the opportunity to serve middle schoolers and lead a team in Dallas. That helped me grow my leadership skills and have intelligent conversations about the Lord. I was able to see how blessed I am and bless others with what I’ve been able to do on mission trips. It has been a practice for how I can evangelize at school and back home.”
In high school, Caleb watched tragedies strike families in PV, and their unwavering faith greatly impacted his own. However, when the Covid-19 virus caused student ministry to go virtual, Caleb struggled to stay consistent in his time with the Lord.
“It was weird going through Covid and not being able to go to Summerfest. It was hard to stay faithful. I still had a good heart posture, but I wasn’t pursuing the Lord, just living a lukewarm life. I wasn’t doing anything bad per say, but I just was definitely living lukewarm.”
In the midst of the Covid-19 pandemic and while still struggling having consistent time with the Lord, Caleb headed off to Missouri State University for college. His goal? Find a girlfriend as soon as possible.
“I was super focused on finding [love] when I got to college, I literally was telling people that when I get to college, I’m finding a girlfriend.”
However, God had different plans in mind for Caleb. Because his older brother was already attending Missouri State and was involved with their college ministry, Caleb knew the importance of finding a church and community quickly. He began attending Fellowship Bible Church and joined a life group. He began going to a college ministry on Thursday nights, and he found a large group of friends who were passionate about knowing the Lord more intimately and spreading the Gospel.
Slowly the Lord started to transform Caleb’s heart and his ideas of what kind of love he needed to pursue.
“I was wrecked because God told me, ‘The only love you need is My love.’ I was blown away at how much I didn’t need the love and approval from other people and how much I felt the love of the Father. I’ve been able to live solely off of God’s love and not others. That was so hard in high school. I lived for the approval of others. He’s shown me how important it is to make Him the first priority in my life.”
His community at school has also continually pushed him and encouraged him to grow in intimacy with the Father. One night in particular, the group of friends enjoyed a hayride and sang worship songs throughout the entire ride. They eventually found themselves on a front porch singing worship songs at 1 o’clock in the morning.
“It was one of the coolest things I’ve ever done. We bundled up because it was 30-40 degrees outside and sang all kinds of worship songs. I thought, ‘Man! How awesome is it that we have a God we can talk to everyday like this?’ It was the most refreshing thing in the world for me.”
Caleb requested the song “The Blessing” and instantly remembered the faith of his friends at PV.
“That song has been impactful for me since Kiley Daniels sang it before her [brain] surgery. I’ve been able to run to the Lord through the examples of others.”
Remembering friends from home and being surrounded by new friends, all who are faithfully walking with the Lord and sharing their hope with others, was powerful for Caleb in that moment.
“It is so cool to see how we push each other towards the Lord and just a testament of how important community can be. We’re all vulnerable with one another and that’s an important part of community.”
While Caleb continues to grow, he can still find himself struggling with bitterness and insecurities when the enemy tells him that he needs to pursue something besides God. When that happens, he goes back to the basics, meditating on John 3:16, spending time with the Lord, and listening to worship music.
“His approval and His love is all that I need, no matter what route my mind goes. My mind has been very detrimental to me at times. When I go to that state, I reevaluate what’s going on and remember that it doesn’t matter what people think of me. Whatever the enemy is telling me right now is not true.”
Recently, Caleb was able to give a mini-sermon as his college church continues to meet in people’s homes. He chose to talk about how important God’s love is.
“God’s love isn’t just what He’s saying He’s going to do. It is what He did.”
Some of Caleb’s most transformative moments have come from his first year in college.
“I’ve been able to feel the true love of Christ because I’ve been surrounded by people who have pushed me towards it. For the first time in my life I don’t feel ashamed to speak what’s on my mind with the Lord. I’ve been able to feel the love of the Lord and that’s changed so many aspects of my life.
With this newfound freedom in knowing that he’s got the love of Jesus no matter what, Caleb confidently states: “Jesus is my security.”
May 27, 2021 | Stories
Danielle’s smile spreads across her face, her hands wrapped around the Keto coffee just delivered to the table. She shares that she isn’t always good at verbalizing her story, but likes to write things down so she’s a little nervous. However, with a brave breath, Danielle begins sharing. Her biological dad hasn’t been in her life for many, many years. He suffered an injury after playing a season for the New York Jets, and after that, he spiraled downhill until his depression, addictions, and abuse were too much for Danielle’s mom to handle. They separated when Danielle and her little sister were quite small and they rarely saw their dad after that.
“You would think I would be angry, but when I was little I would say my prayers with my mom then she’d leave the room and I’d thank God for being my Dad. It didn’t all matter because He was my real Dad and one day I’d live with my real Dad. I would pray: ‘Thank You for being my real Father. Thank You.’”
Growing up, Danielle regularly went to church with her mom and little sister and attended a private Christian school. Danielle’s mom remarried, and while loving, they were very strict.
When Danielle turned twelve, much of her world turned upside down.
“In sixth grade I changed from a Christian education to a public education and that was a hard change – not a good change. I also stopped seeing my biological father and it was the first time I realized I don’t look like everyone else. My biological father is black and my mom is white, and she remarried a Hispanic man, my step-father who raised me. It was hard because I stood out – I didn’t look like my parents or friends. I had my first anxiety attack that year at school, too. I became a chameleon. I’m good at that and can blend well into my surroundings. I just didn’t choose a good background to mold into. There was a lot of anger and confusion at that time, and it spilled over into years and years of rebellion and doubt and anxiety.”
In high school, Danielle continued to make poor decisions that left her full of guilt and shame.
“Minus all the crazy stuff, I thought my life was pretty easy. It wasn’t traumatic and I did feel close to Christ as a child. I was saturated with Jesus and didn’t know anything else. But I stopped going to youth group in high school because I felt so guilty. In college I was invited to go to the campus church but couldn’t show my face because I was a sorority girl who partied.”
Danielle still desperately wanted to know Jesus more and wanted to change.
“I always let guilt get in the way of a true transformation.”
Danielle met Ben her freshman year at K-State where he played baseball.
“He was with me during my chaotic college years. He was, however, grounded and focused on his goal: professional ball. He was drafted our junior year and left K-State. By the time I graduated college and moved to Tulsa to teach, he was playing minor-league baseball in California.”
Danielle used the move to Tulsa as a way to break free from the party scenes she frequented.
“[In Kansas City] I was partying too hard and needed to get away. [In Tulsa] I didn’t know anyone, got a one bedroom apartment and was teaching. I was only there for six months because Ben blew out his shoulder.”
However, during those six months, Danielle found a church and began getting plugged in, and Ben gave his life to the Lord. After Ben’s injury, he decided to join the railroad. They quickly married in Kansas City and moved together to Lincoln, Nebraska, for Ben’s new job. Any transformation that had begun to take place in Danielle’s life quickly deteriorated after their move. Ben was gone often for work, and Danielle filled the time without him by working hard and partying with co-workers and new friends.
“I was bar hopping and drinking and blacking out every single time I drank. I remember being drunk sometimes and going out and looking at the stars. I would talk to God drunk, but I’d feel so much shame the next day, and I’d be sick all day. Every weekend I was recovering from the partying, and I didn’t even think about God then. I couldn’t let my mind go there. Did I think God loved me? Yes. But I couldn’t think about that. I kept thinking, ‘How am I going to love myself better?’ and I’d vow to make better decisions and be the best at my job.”
She and Ben weren’t unhappy, but they weren’t connected and seemed more like ships passing in the night. Then one day everything changed.
“It continued like that until I got pregnant with Hart. I had changed career paths and managed a kickboxing gym. Ben and I were just in and out, passing each other all the time. But the minute I got pregnant, it brought me to my knees. I realized how selfish and self-serving I was and now I have a little person. I desperately wanted more for them. I felt like God was telling me, ‘It’s your life that just changed, not your skin.’”
In an instant, Danielle recognized that she wanted more for herself and for her future children.
“I wanted my child to know Christ early on. I didn’t think we could be the parents that I wanted to be without a relationship with Christ.”
Danielle began sharing her heart with her mom, and they chose to work through a Proverbs 31 Bible study together.
“That was me making another first step. I was never someone who didn’t believe then had a radical transformation. I’ve just left God so many times and slammed the door so many times. He’s given me many opportunities…but I’d slam the door.”
Danielle knew that if the transformation was going to continue, she needed to surround herself with Godly influences. She began praying for the Lord to provide her with friends that will make her closer to the Lord and graciously allow friendships that weren’t honoring or uplifting to Him to dissolve.
“I started changing the music I was listening to. I love music, I’m very driven by music. I easily take in what’s around me and who I’m with. I soak in a mood in the room, even if it’s not my own mood, I just soak it in because I never had a clear identity growing up. I just wanted to be like everyone else around me. I changed what I watched on TV too. We couldn’t find a church we really liked so my main focus was doing Bible studies with my mom and praying with her.”
As Danielle continued to radically change, her friends began asking questions, and she felt like she didn’t belong with them, but she wasn’t a perfect Christian, either.
“I felt a lot of guilt. I wasted a lot of years just doing my own thing. One thing my mom said on the phone that stuck out to me was: ‘There’s no such thing as a perfect Christian, so if you’re looking to be one, you’re going to fail. You just have to take the steps, and you have to try.’ I like to be perfect at everything I do, so I really struggled with that.”
It wasn’t long before Ben and Danielle decided to move to Kansas City to be closer to family and so Danielle could be a stay-at-home mom. On a walk in their new neighborhood, they met a couple who encouraged them to try out Pleasant Valley.
Being a new mama in a new part of Kansas City, Danielle joined PV’s moms ministry, she and Ben joined a community group, and eventually they were baptized together.
“Finding Christ as an adult, I just feel it so differently. I’m more mature and aware. I don’t think some of my old friends understand even the language I use now. I don’t curse and don’t like to be around it. I’ve had questions about why I don’t curse or curse in front of my kids.”
Danielle sometimes still feels like she’s in the middle – not like her old friends she partied with but not like her new friends she has Christian community with.
“I get around my small group, and I’m the ‘The Ex-Partier’ and that feels like my identity. I feel like I’m not ‘Christian’ enough for them. There seems to always be something holding me back at times and I need to get over it because I know God’s over it. He’s over me always thinking about it, too. I need to just move on. Move on!”
Danielle’s laugh fills the air. Her honesty in her journey is palpable and relatable. There’s no pretending with Danielle. She is who she is and she is still growing, still deepening her roots, still becoming more confident in her identity in Jesus. She is continuing to fall more and more in love with Him.
“Some people think a relationship with Christ is a lot of rules and checking off the list. When you just don’t worry about that, if you believe your story is written and God loves you, you don’t have to worry so much. It has always been more about a relationship with God. God is my real Father. My focus has always been a relationship more than how many times in a month I am going to church. How am I going to build my relationship with Him? People will use that [God is loving] to condone some lifestyles, and I don’t condone behaviors or lifestyles that aren’t biblical, but He has always shown me so much love. I don’t deserve anything I have. I don’t deserve my children, my husband, to stay at home and raise my kids. I get nothing but love no matter what I do. Jesus is love.”
